Short answer
Empathy statements are short and simple phrases your business can use to show a customer you understand what they are going through. The best way to show empathy is to make it seem natural. Here are some examples of how it might sound on a customer service call. “I can hear how frustrating this has been” or “I’d be worried too.” A good response immediately acknowledges the issue of concern, recognizes how the customer is affected, and details next steps to address the problem. In customer service empathy statements work best in three parts: name the feeling, show you understand why, and say what you’ll do next. At Southern Voices, live agents use them on calls 24/7/365, in English and Spanish.
Many times customers call a business because they have a problem and need help resolving it. Maybe, their furnace won’t turn on, or an important order is delayed or lost, a bill is incorrect, or they’ve been attempting to reach someone to help for days. The very first thing these customers need to hear is that the agent taking their call understands what is happening. When a customer calls with a problem, knowing their frustration is understood can make a big difference. Before a solution is offered, customers need to know they are being heard.
This is where an empathy statement can be extremely beneficial. It shows your customer you are listening and their concern/issue is being taken seriously. Empathy in customer service doesn’t mean you agree with everything the customer is saying, but showing understanding can help de-escalate a situation so that the call ends with a solution versus a complaint.
This guide describes how to ensure your empathy statements are effective, example of various empathy statements for different situations, phrases to avoid, and how to utilize them on both calls and in emails.
What Is an Empathy Statement?
An empathy statement acknowledges the customer’s feelings before you move to the solution. Effective empathy statements must have three parts.
Name the feeling
Say what you hear: frustrated, worried, confused, let down. “That sounds really frustrating.”
Show why it makes sense
Connect it to their situation, so it isn’t a canned line. “You were promised a callback yesterday and didn’t get one.”
Say what happens next
Turn the empathy into action. “Let me find out where this stands right now.”
Empathy Statements for Common Customer Service Situations
Pick the one that fits, then make it specific to the caller. Use their words whenever possible.
The customer is upset
- “I can hear how frustrating this has been.”
- “I’d be upset too if that happened to me.”
- “Thank you for telling me. Let’s sort this out.”
They’ve been waiting
- “I’m sorry you’ve had to wait this long.”
- “You shouldn’t have had to call more than once.”
- “I’ll stay with this until you have an answer.”
Something went wrong on your side
- “You’re right, that should not have happened.”
- “I’m sorry we got that wrong.”
- “Here’s what I’m going to do to fix it.”
They’re worried
- “That sounds stressful. Let’s take it one step at a time.”
- “I understand why you’re concerned.”
- “You did the right thing by calling.”
You have to say no
- “I know that isn’t the answer you were hoping for.”
- “I wish I had better news.”
- “Here’s what I can do instead.”
They’re confused
- “That’s a fair question. A lot of people ask it.”
- “Let me walk you through it.”
- “Stop me any time if something isn’t clear.”
They want to cancel
- “I’m sorry to hear you’re thinking of leaving.”
- “Can you tell me what changed? I’d like to understand.”
- “If there’s something I can fix, I want to try.”
They’re calling after hours
- “I’m glad you called. You’ve reached a live person.”
- “I’ll make sure this gets to the right person.”
- “Here’s exactly what happens next.”
Which Phrases Should You Avoid?
Some phrases may seem empathetic on paper but have the opposite effect on a call. They tend to dismiss the feeling, blame the customer, or make a promise without acting.
| Instead of | Try | Why |
|---|---|---|
| “Calm down.” | “I can hear this has been a lot. Let’s fix it.” | Telling someone to calm down rarely calms them down. |
| “I understand.” (and nothing else) | “I understand. You were told it would ship Monday and it hasn’t.” | On its own it sounds automatic. Add the specifics. |
| “That’s our policy.” | “Here’s why that rule exists, and here’s what I can do.” | Explains instead of shutting the door. |
| “You should have…” | “Next time, the fastest way is… For now, let’s…” | Moves forward without blame. |
| “I’m sorry you feel that way.” | “I’m sorry this happened.” | Apologize for the situation, not their reaction. |
| “There’s nothing I can do.” | “Here’s what I can do.” | There’s almost always a next step. |
Is “I understand” an empathy statement? It can be, but only when you follow it with what you understand. Otherwise callers hear it as a script.
Empathy Must Be Accompanied By Action
Customers can tell the difference between someone repeating a phrase and an actual person that understands their frustration and can explain what happens next. The empathy statement is the starting point. Solving the customer’s problem, or explaining exactly what next steps are, is what keeps their trust.
How Do You Deliver Empathy Statements on a Phone Call?
On the phone you are unable to see a customer’s expression, so you must pay careful attention to the customer’s tone and pace. Listen to the customer and follow these steps to effectively use empathy statements on customer calls.
- Let the customer finish.Don’t interrupt the first explanation, even if you already know the answer. Interrupting feels like a lack of caring.
- Repeat it back.Use one empathy statement that reflects what the customer said. One sincere line beats three generic ones.
- Own your part.If something went wrong on your side, say so. Don’t hide behind “the system.”
- Explain next steps.A specific action and a time frame you can keep: “I’m sending this to the on-call manager now.”
- Follow through.Call back when you said you would. The best empathy statement is a promise kept.
What Does an Empathetic Email Look Like?
The same three part approach works in an email. Emails should acknowledge the customer’s frustration, show they understand why the customer feels a certain way, and explain next steps. Keep it short, specific and signed by a real person. Here’s an empathetic email template you can adapt:
Hi [Name],
Thank you for letting us know about [the problem]. I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with this, especially after [the specific detail they mentioned].
Here’s what I’ve done: [action]. You’ll hear from [person or team] by [time].
If anything changes before then, reply here or call [number] and ask for me.
[Your name]
If the reason for the email is a call you couldn’t answer, see how to say “sorry I missed your call” professionally.
Frequently asked questions
What are empathy statements?
Short phrases that acknowledge how someone feels, like “That sounds really frustrating” or “I’d be worried too.” In customer service, they show the caller you understand the problem before you start solving it.
What is an example of an empathy statement?
“You were promised a callback yesterday and didn’t get one. I’m sorry. Let me find out where this stands right now.” It names the problem, shows you understand why the caller is upset, and says what happens next.
Is “I understand” an empathy statement?
Only when you say what you understand. “I understand” on its own sounds automatic. “I understand, you’ve been without heat since last night” sounds like you were listening.
Why are empathy statements important in customer service?
Upset callers don’t hear solutions until they feel heard. A sincere empathy statement lowers the temperature, so the rest of the call goes faster and the customer is more likely to stay. Callers still prefer a person for this, as we cover in why customers still prefer a human on the phone.
How many empathy statements should you use on one call?
Usually one or two. Repeating them sounds scripted. Use one early, when the caller explains the problem, and another if the news gets worse.
Can an answering service use our empathy statements?
Yes. With Southern Voices, your greeting, wording and escalation rules go into a custom script, and agents follow it on every call. See how outsourced customer service with live agents works, or get a quote. If you’re a small business weighing it up, start with customer service outsourcing for small business.
